Big brother is watching!

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Pizza Anyone?

The future of customer care …

Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have you …
Customer: Helloo, can I order …
Operator: Can I have your multi-purpose card number first, Sir?
Customer: It’s eh … hold on … 6102049998-45-54610.
Operator: OK …., you’re … Mr Singh and you’re calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 40942366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is 0142662566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?
Customer: Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator: We are connected to the system Sir.
Customer: May I order your Seafood Pizza …
Operator: That’s not a good idea Sir.
Customer: How come?
Operator: According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir.
Customer: What? … What do you recommend then?
Operator: Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You’ll like it.
Customer: How do you know for sure?
Operator: You borrowed a book entitled Popular Hokkien Dishes from the National Library last week Sir.
Customer: OK I give up … Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?
Operator: That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is $49.99.
Customer: Can I pay by credit card?
Operator: I’m afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank $3,720.55 since October last year. That’s not including the late payment charges on your housing loan Sir.
Customer: I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives.
Operator: You can’t Sir. Based on the records, you’ve reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today.
Customer: Never mind just send the pizza. I’ll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?
Operator: According to the details in system, you own a scooter, registration number 1123 …
Customer: @#$*^&&%#@!&&&
Operator: Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987 you were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman.
Customer: [Speechless]
Operator: Is there anything else Sir?
Customer: Nothing … by the way … aren’t you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?
Operator: We normally would Sir, but based on your records you’re also diabetic …
Customer: Langgar!
Operator: What did you say?
Customer: Nothing.

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About Gintai_昇泰

I'm a Chinese Singaporean living in the Eastern part of Singapore. I tweet on current affairs & inspirational quotes. I blog on issues or events if they interest me. I write for pleasure. I also write mainly for my family and friends.
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10 Responses to Big brother is watching!

  1. LOL says:

    LOL… save the pizza, I’ll go visit the prata man

    • THE SYSTEM says:

      THE SYSTEM : All Prata men are also connected to ME, sir!

      • patriot says:

        This is the so-called advancement
        of Science and technology.

        Are You updated?

        • patriot says:

          Like to add that some claim that having good command of the English Language will advance Science even further.

          There is also widespread belief that if one is religious, he/she will be a better being.

          Lolx:……..

          patriot

          • THE SYSTEM says:

            Sir, THE SYSTEM is also a kind of religion. I am programmed not to make judgement on religion. I am not sure whether if one is religious, he/she will be a better being. However as long as you are a human being you will be connected and be monitored by THE SYSTEM, Sir!

          • Alfonsos says:

            Oh yes Ming Yi was a monk even! Remember the Ren Ci debacle?

        • THE SYSTEM says:

          Sir, I am always up to date! You have a friend call Gintai who works at SMRT. You do not believe in any religion. You are a Singaporean.

  2. patriot says:

    The System in Sin is
    as good as religions.

    Believe in it as one
    gets a place in heaven.

    patriot

  3. Concerned person. says:

    Hi Gintai,
    What happen to you? No new news today? Hope you are well!
    From: ex SMRT taxi driver

Comments are closed.